Quite a while back I wrote a poem called "The cocoon between what crawls and what flies". And I realized today even though it's tricky, even though I'm not, nor will I ever be, 100% where I will be, even though a lot of things... I am not living in the cocoon. There are even ways I used to think that were cocoon ways of thinking. Some days I wonder if I may be flying. It's hard to tell though.
Don't get me wrong now. I'm distracted at work. Not as productive. Still have moments of freaking out or self judgment. I am ever aware of my humanity AND (along with) my longings for integrity and godliness... but in the midst of this a shift has occurred. It's quite curious. Zu your comments of yesterday and other people's comments before seem to confirm this. At least it feels like it. And it's been great that some of you even think I am actually doing this thing with integrity. I hope so!
I think I'm going to have to write a new version of that poem. ;)
On a totally unrelated note because I want to remember it... a friend of mine said recently "One of the side effects of having a cold is non-sequiturs." For some reason that made me grin.