Mindfulness

Blogging is about stating what is for me this day. An intentional act of mindfulness and remembering. Or of course on some days "mindlessness" as in being or feeling out of my mind. But even in that I am aware that I am anchored in this process by my desire for mindfulness and integrity. A desire to lead an examined life. My longing to be fully present.

Trouble is, these virtues are a bit harder to do. It's easier to talk about them. And when it comes to work in particular I am finding I need to wrestle in order to eek out productivity that I expect from myself. Self hate for not doing enough never works. I have learned this in my story the hard way and I have worked on being more gentle with myself. So I live in the both/and space of finding I am not where I want to be in regards to productivity etc. and yet seek to be as kind to myself as others are generally to me.

In the midst of all of this last week my vocational coach gave me some great things to think about that increased my state of presence. They felt like a gift to me. So I share them with you.

He asked the following:

At what moment(s) have you been fully engaged? At what moment did you find yourself away or uninvolved? What actions have you committed to doing as a result of this? Transform this unproductivity into something else. See if this is an invitation to work on that (unproductive area) than work on what you are supposed to do. Maybe what is, is to be. Rather than fight it seek to converse with it. What do you want today? Or in conversing with it ask it directly. Unproductively would you please leave today. We will talk tonight. Think of ways to re-center. Go outside and take the number of gulps of breath up to your age. What is air but the spirit? The metaphor is powerful. mindfulness. Perhaps unproductivity is an invitation to mindfulness...

Isn't that amazing. I thought so.