Book: Oranges are not the only fruit

I am sitting in the library right now on a Sat. having just spent the afternoon reading the book "Oranges are not the only fruit" by Jeanette Winterson.

It's the story of a girl growing up in a evangelical christian home and what it was like for her. It's also the story of how she comes to terms with her unorthodox sexuality. I guess it's based on her real story. I heard about it on some NPR podcast and was curious so I came to look it up. I am glad I did.

I felt a lot while reading it. I felt sad because it sounded like such a painful growing up. I felt sad because I get what that would have been like in some respects. I felt a lot of rage at the church she was in, both her parents, and the "Church" in general. I felt fear because I could relate to it. I can't quite get how she somehow made this journey from the "her" she was with her family and church when young to being OK with herself as is at the end. How did she do that? Mentally or emotionally? I felt soooooo grateful to be the age I am, living on my own, and outside my house. I also cheered on the gracious accepting characters in the book. IGlad that they exist in life and the world somewhere. It's a good read.

I was hoping it would clarify things for me. It didn't really. Reading other people's stories is one of the more clarifying things in life though so it's still good.

Another thought I had was that one of the reasons the next step was easier for her is that she only had two choices because her world was so polarized. She had no middle option. Either she renounced loving Melanie and was prayed for/over so she would no longer be demon possessed (which is what her church thought she was) OR she had to leave the church and faith entirely. It was one or the other. That makes it painful but simpler I think. Plus at least for a short time she had a person who felt the same way towards her. I think mutuality of feeling helps clarify sometimes. I've never had mutuality in feeling like that though so what the heck do I know. Anyway. I'm glad I read it.