Things I did at xmas that helped

Things I did during christmas with the family that helped my mental health.

• I drove myself from my aunt & uncles to my grandma's house even though I could have gone with my brother & sister in law just so I could get some time away.
• I blogged here which was better than journaling because even if no one comments I feel like I am at least journaling in some sort of community
• I listened to podcasts from Berkley. Psychology lectures on personality disorders. Which made me feel thoughtful and less mentally muddy and the lecturer was quite articulate.
• When my car broke down I checked into a hotel and pretended it was an internet surfing, tv watching, I'm finally away from the unspokeness with my family ... vacation. (I hope my car get's fixed tomorrow.)
• I journaled and went and got coffee in the mornings when I was at my grandma's.
• I told myself that I am not bad even though I felt like I was. (very cognitive behavioral of me).
• I emailed my friend "j" just to tell someone about the xmas eve from hell. It helps that she hears me and likes me.
• Just now I emailed my cousin zuzu.
  
• I wore my orange scarf that my friend "l" made me because it felt like a security blanket. It was about as good as a teddy bear. :)
  
• I didn't escalate anything with my family that would cause them say something, and cause me to self hate. I at least knew I couldn't handle it. But, they did say stupid stuff about gay people and liberals.